Had he lost his tongue somewhere in the darkness? It seemed highly likely, because no matter how he strained himself he couldn't find it in his capabilities to respond to further query from the melanistic doe. Shivering and tongue-tied he simply clung to her side, eyes closed tightly as if to escape the darkness of the void by simply losing himself in the heartbeat of the mare.

Mechanically he followed along as she lead them back up into the light, a puppet managed by invisible strings and a grinning madman who didn't mind tormenting the young soul. Had he gone mad in the deep blackness of oblivion? Not quite. The mind of the boy was stronger than that, made of something more durable and flexible. It wasn't that he had lost his senses, but rather that they had become paralyzed, numbed, dull and insensitive in the clasp of fear.
It took the kindness of a warm voice to bring him back from the petrified catatonic state, and an offer for something he had so sorely missed. Kari didn't think as he turned around on the spot, delicate nose moving to trail along the side of the horned lady as if afraid that she might disappear if he let go. Nor did he respond as the small head ducked beneath her belly and greedily searched his way to swollen teats, eager to embrace them with starving lips.

How long had it been since he last feasted on rich, creamy milk, fat and life-givingly full of vital substances? He had lost track of the days in the dull glow of never-fading crystal and shimmering fungi, too frightened of the dangers above to climb the steep slope and poke his head beyond the walls of the shelter. All he knew was that it had been too long, that the glitter of emerald grasses and pearly splashes of mineral water no longer held any charm, that the nights spent in a corner of the outer cave was becoming unbearable in their restless struggle against friends and foes, angels and demons pulling him along in nightmarish parades.

Slowly, gradually with every deep gulp, some part of the void within himself began to fill up. The tremble that had wrecked the frail chassis faded to stillness in pace with the swelling of the belly, and as peace eventually returned to his mind the long, coiling tail began to curl and thrash in contentment behind the rump.

Perhaps he quit sooner than the sons of hellion would have done. Perhaps, as the young colt came to his senses by the staving of hunger, he began to realize that it wasn't his own shadowmare that he was suckling from. As he emerged from the warm, fragrant embrace with milk-stained lips and a slightly sheepish expression Kari finally was able to take a better look at his rescuer, chiseled ears tipping forward as he gazed up at her. Cerulean visage took in the deep blackness of her hide and bare shoulders, the tall built so different from the winged sleuth that had birthed him. He noticed the horns, and with a shock of mixed excitement and.. well shock, he realized that she wasn't even a pegasus.

Was this the first horned one he had seen? Well, besides his father, but Carnesîr would only barely count as Kari had been but a newborn when laying eyes upon his sire. He wrecked his brain trying to remember if there had been any other instance that a horned one had crossed his path - there had been a plain one, a winged mare, and surely some others - but eventually he had to give up. The thoughts clearly weren't as vivid and easy to access as was normal. Besides, there were more pressing things to think of...

"Thank you" he said in a quiet murmur and sank to the ground, exhausted from the ordeal and happy to find himself resting on soft damp moss rather than cold, hard rock. It was tempting to let the eyes fall shut and just drift off, but that would have been very rude to the nice lady. He had to stay awake, respond to her questions... he remember she asked questions, but if he had answered any of them... "I'm Kari" he said just in case, finding it easier to offer than having to wait and wonder if it was of interest.


I see your true colors

Succumbing to the deep embrace of sleep was as easy as it had been tempting. The boy needed little encouragement to let go of consciousness, and so when warm touch and gentle words assured that it was alright, that his attempts at standing on ceremony and uphold proper etiquette had been sufficient, the child let his head sink down upon the moss. It was a soft and fragrant pillow; he never got to repeat his thank you before a great wave rolled in to carry him off, away to dreamland.

He didn't sleep well, however. As hours slowly seeped by the lithe frame of the boy kept tossing and turning in restless throws, eyes stirring beneath closed lids as though following erratic paths of unknown entities that chased through his mind. Dusty kissers kept mumbling fragmented words, sentences half understandable that were cut off and started as he voiced feeble protests. He never woke up, not really; the sleep was too deep for that, too heavily draped over a strained mind ready to burst with impressions sights and ideas. No, he didn't wake, but not much rest was granted either and by the time the tormented lines faded from around the eyes and sticky lids pried open he was only marginally more rested than before.

For some time Kari simply lay there on the ground, breathing and blinking as reality sank back over him (or did he rise into it?). As he licked the lips the taste of dread died away on the tongue, leaden weight in the gut replaced by a faint churn that was as comforting as it was familiar. Hunger he could deal with. Hunger was, in comparison, a very simple problem with multiple solutions, one of which should remain in some proximity to himself. The dreams were different. How did you combat dreams? How did you fight monsters woven from fear and loneliness, guilt and desperation when every moment that flowed past reduced the chances of him ever seeing his mother again? The pressure only made them worse, as if they fed from the stress and allowed them to multiply.

Heaving the chest in a sigh worthy of a grayed stallion with silver beard and fungi growing along back the colt rolled over to the belly and wobbled up on his feet, as always finding his legs awkwardly long and hard to hands. With the steely neck set low and wings drooping tiredly from the sides he tripped away between the trees, towards the sound of a gurgling stream. The water was cold, clear; it tasted of ice and rock, and as he drank Kari wondered if it had begun to snow somewhere above the heads of the horses that huddled there. The thought was far from encouraging. It had been Orangemoon when he came down here, mid fall with orange leaves and sunny days followed by chilly nights that left the meadows and trees covered in glittering frost. How long had he been down here, how long would it take before he was able to go back outside? Not for the first time he cursed the mares that had stopped him the first time he tried to go after Shadow, thus taking away his drive, his momentum, his... his courage. If only they hadn't stopped him...

With that thought looming over him like a dark cloud the boy finished up his business by the stream and went back to where he had slept, cautiously eying the horses that moved through the forested cavern. Most were strangers, grown stallions of mares of every color shade an pattern imaginable, but as he moved the scrawny colt was looking - as always - for one particular horse. Black, black as the darkness of the pit with eyes that put the dancing heavenly lights of the north to shame, elegant feather wings and a look on her face that, well, he frankly couldn't even imagine. He'd never seen Shadow truly happy or relieved, after all - and seeing him would hardly produce any of these emotions with his reluctant mother.


ooc: sorry for the wait and for the RAMBLE ;__;

I see your true colors