Ktulu

"Yes."She confirmed Apollo's question. He probably thought she was crazy for wanting to make her home there. He knew better than anyone else (exept probably Lakota) how she had agonized over the contract she'd entered into with the Basin. She had thought and pondered, searched for some way to weasle out of it, but nothing had gone he way. When the battle had come she'd sent her warriors into the mists to fight. And for what? "I have to." She said. "I need to make it up to them."If he felt any of the guilt that she did then he would understand her need to make amends.

As she looked at Apollo her guilt only increased because she had dragged him into it and when it was all said and done she ran away and left him with the aftermath to deal with. He bore the weight of it with more grace than she ever woud have been able to and yet he didn't seem to hold any hard feelings toward her. He was better than she was. "I'm so sorry, Apollo." She whispered. Her gaze fell toward the ground and she watched Eytan as he greeted his old friend. "I made a mess of everything and left you to deal with it." She was a bad leader and an even worse friend and yet he wanted to go with her and Lakota to the Edge. He wanted to stay with her.

Her head lifted and she looked at Apollo again as his words began to sink in. "You don't?" She didn't understand why he wasn't upset with her let alone why he would want to be by her side for as long as he claimed. The dropped another bomb on her and she stared, disbelieving that she had just heard him tell her that he loved her. It couldn't be, she had to just be hearing things. Or maybe his love for her was a friend love and not the same love that she and Lakota shared and ... Oh god, Lakota. What would she think if she knew that he was professing his love. They had gone through so much to get where they were.

"What?" There was no doubt in her mind that she loved the Merciful, but she could not risk what she had with Lakota no matter how much her heart screamed that she should say the words back. They were on the tip of her tongue, 'I love you, too.' and yet she choked them back, frustrated with herself for thinking instead of just saying. But Lakota ... she'd already hurt her so much she couldn't hurt her more. She didn't want to hurt Apollo either... "Me, too." He would understand, wouldn't he? He would know how hard the words were for her to speak, would know that she had committed herself to Lakota and didn't want to hurt her fragile poisoner again.

"."