"aurelia talk"
Mauja pisses me off. Perhaps when I was almost setting him on fire wasn't the lowest point of our conversation...
this was. He didn't really
reject me, but he did everything to divert the conversation away from my feelings to him. Now this was about who likes me and who doesn't? Well, you don't, Mauja. No matter
how much I wish you did. I know love is a strong word, perhaps this is why I've avoided the word.
Love. It might be what I feel, but it might just be a crush-- a really strong crush?
Mauja the Stoneclad. He has a reply for everything. Can anything actually make him
think? I don't mean mathematically think, I mean philosophically think. A philosophical horse takes
time to think about things. They think about the meaning of things, not the basic meaning, but the hidden meanings. I can say, "Ya, I'm really good!" To a horse that asks about my day, and they can believe me, or they can realize that I don't
sound happy. Maybe they'll see my gloomy features and realize something isn't right. Mauja, are you philosophical?
"You can lie, Mauja." Now my eyes blink upwards from the ground to look at him. Mauja, here in the flesh. Mauja, here in the flesh while trying to change the subject.
"It didn't seem like you liked me when you first got here. Then you seemed to like me a lot, but now," I shake my head slowly side to side,
"I'm not so sure." I look right at him. My personality bubbles with flint and steel. I just need
a little more before I am set of-- before the flint and steel are stuck together.
"I've been told differences make us strong, Mauja." My mom and dad always told me this. They seemed to be pretty opposite, yet they got along fine. Perhaps they were fine together, but such opposite extremes created me, a fire mare with two children, a whole lot of enemies, and no friends. Maybe I've always been doomed to fail. My failure was set up when my father decided to mount my mother. This is why opposites should not mix-- to save the world of hopeless cases like me.