Her question had no answer except the pounding of the rain against the glass walls. Even Thranduil, who spun yarns of golden silk from piles of murky nothingness could not find an answer to her query. Or, more likely, there was no answer other than the one he had given. She supposed, what it really came down to in the end, was that love was not for the selfish. No matter how she might try to convince herself otherwise, no matter what others might see in her, there was no denying it- her heart and soul were selfish. She cared about herself more than others and given the chance, she would save her skin first.

Oh, sure, there were moments were she would do anything for her herd, but how real were those moments? Had she really been fighting for the herd when she fought Aurelia or Farenjar? Had she really sought out magic from the gods for her family or for her own selfish gain? Had she, had she, had she… So many questions. They just added to the list without answer that she either refused to want or try to solve. They were mysteries left covered by a sheet, left dusty in the corner. And while her niceties and games were no act, it had always been to her benefit that they covered up the worse parts of her personality.

So instead of being upset that there was no answer from him, no reconcile for her broken heart, she smiled at his words and half-closed her eyes in memories. “A massive owl found me at the cliff ledge of my home. He gave me the feathers the egg sits on, and the egg itself.” Then, opening her eyes wider, she even managed to chuckle. “It was quite a sight to see him fly.” Where he had come from and where he had gone to since were yet mysteries to her, for she had never seen him in the Edge before, but he seemed to have some knowledge of her and her home.

“He gave it to me to watch over and care for, so that when it hatches I’ll have a companion… I’m afraid.” The admission was nothing new, the queen was frightened of many things, although this fear was much more abstract than she was used to. “I’m afraid I won’t know how to love him.” That’s what she had told the owl, after all. How would she know? He had seemed to place a lot of faith in her, but now the painted queen was not so sure. At any rate, there were other mysteries to solve.

“Why were you trying to drown yourself in the rain?” she offered with a laugh, trying to lighten the mood as the water continued to beat against the temporary enclosure she had erected. Even now, the queen still found herself looking at it, wondering where this wonderful gift had come from.