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11-04-2014, 01:51 PM
If Ulrik had any saving grace in the mountain of character flaws, it was his intelligence. Going head to head with the large, muscular Goldie would do nothing but leave him broken and smashed like when he fought his cousin, Torleik. The Engineer learned from his mistakes, as any good scientist would, so his battle style this time was bounce in for an attack and then haul ass out of the way. This was contrary to his initial plan, but Ulrik was certainly adaptable – out of respect for natural evolution, of course. Socially, he understood that there were concepts such as “honor”, “dignity”, and “a good fight”. Understanding did not make him think that they weren’t bullshit, which, they were. A good fight was a fight which was won, no matter how it was won, so he had no qualms about running away .
The laceration on his back protested, of course, but it was better that the lone injury hurt than have others join it; that would make him weaker. Ulrik felt a rush of wind which could only be from wings opening, and he chanced a glance over his shoulder as he avoided attack, watching as the great beast lost balance and slid through the sand. He seemed to have injured himself further, which was just entirely amusing. Honestly, this was a battle between brute strength and intellect, and the secret was that wits and wiles would always win. At least, that’s what he thought in the over-inflated pride of his brilliant mind.
He took advantage of Goldie’s position and jumped forward again, using his dual horns to aim for those powerful, large wings. Much to his pleasure, he felt the tugging at his skull of impact. Like plucking a chicken, feathers tore free from where his horn clawed, and he even felt it pull against the thick cords of muscle that made the appendages flight-worthy. The aim at his hock did not make it, but Ulrik was satisfied with what he received instead.
The familiar crackle of electricity alerted Ulrik to a very interesting power this Goldie must possess. “Kirchoff! Careful!” Almost as quickly as the hound’s jaws wrapped around feathers, he let go, only receiving a minor twinge from the power as he slinked away. Kirchoff wanted to thank Ulrik, but he was unsure of how to even start to do anything positive toward the genius brute. Instead, he stayed out of the battle, watching now that his help was no longer needed. Ulrik was a powerful manipulator of spark, so Kirchoff was confident that his wild bondmate would be safe.
Ulrik watched the blue sparks which illuminated his opponent like fire, and he saw the hind limb jolting out toward him easily in the darkness. The black stallion dodged impact, feeling the hairs on his mane and his back rise up with the polarity of Goldie’s power, and the laceration on his back protested at his sudden dive. Unfortunately, electricity had this way of traveling and jumping from conductor to conductor, so even though he avoided impact, one of the sparks jumped onto his back. He grunted through clenched, sore teeth as it caused a unique, cold burn to his skin, just around the area where the gash already was. Ulrik was used to that pain, since his machines were sometimes fickle when he shoved parts around with his nose, but that didn’t make it hurt any less. Damn.
Overall, he was fairly okay. One laceration, one burn, sore teeth… Not bad for a go against this golden behemoth who seemed to be dealing with some sort of combination of anger issues and psychosis. Ulrik trotted sorely to a halt, glancing around and noticing once again the night sky and the open air. Something about battle was suffocating, and now that it was over, he was free again. The Engineer raised a brow at his opponent, wondering what he could even say given the drama of their encounter. He was never one for tact, but this situation deserved some thought. “Thanks, Goldie.” He was not one to comment on another’s mental state, so he would let it go.
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[Closing Defense] [693 words according to Word]
Summary: Ulrik was shocked/burned on the back and Kirchoff's mouth was lightly shocked.
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Teaching Spar Notes:
1. I actually liked this post! I thought it read very clearly and concisely, and I actually didn't have any issues getting through it the first time around.
2. Usually what I do is take my opponent's attacks and make a scale for myself. So, for example, this is what I did with Kaj's kick and shock attack toward Ulrik.
1 - minor burn but avoid the kick
2. - slightly more tough burn, but avoided a kick
3. - a shock and scraping the hair off of his back
4. - a shock and maybe some sort of laceration (actual skin splitting)
5. - a shock and a deep bruise and laceration
6. - the kick landed 100% and caused severe muscle/skeletal damage and was shocked
So that's generally how I respond with the 3/4 range. I base it between the two extremes. I think you did take the damage really well. You had some severity because flying would be difficult tomorrow (like you said in your post), but you also didn't make Ulrik compromise the entire wing like a 6 probably would have done.
I can see how the damage after damage would be difficult to write, especially with the word limit. But, I think that you did a good job. I don't really have an answer on how to do this other than to gloss over past injuries and just have it affect their future movement.
3. You don't have to bring something from past spars in every time! It's just another way you can add some evidence to any claim you make in writing. For example, if you say "Kaj knew that this attack was a good one", then you should follow up with the fact that he knows because of a prior battle. But, if Kaj is trying something new, naturally, you wouldn't have to bring in anything from the past.
4. The darkness stuff was spot on! Awesome! I actually got bonus points for doing the same thing in a test battle once.
5. I think that was great! You really brought in the power of wings as well as their detriment in battle. Such big appendages could be really good or really bad, and using that as a natural reason to take damage was really, really realistic! A+!
6. Honestly, I think that this was your best post yet. I found 0 grammar or other issues. Nothing stuck out to me as being "weird". Everything fell in line with the dice rolls. I really liked the anger and emotion. This is 100% solid! I have nothing more to add.
Thank you so much for letting this be a teaching spar.
AND MAY THE ODDS BE EVER IN YOUR FAVOR!
:D We will see if the judging lines up with what I have been saying.
(Please tag me in every post)
