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I had come here for peace. This is where lovers were, and that meant it had to be peaceful. You would never bring your lover somewhere loud and obnoxious, right? I wouldn't have ever done that. Yet, I was quite surprised to see a lone stallion. He was cute enough, but I had a track record of not going for paints. It wasn't me being racist or anything, they just weren't all that attractive. And as of now, I really wasn't in any sort of mood to flirt. I watched him play with the branches, wondering when something bad was going to happen. On doesn't simply play with leave and branches and not expect something to happen.
And then it happened.
The branch slipped from his grip and then slapped him. I cocked my had to the side slightly amused by this. The amusement was shortlived, and only offered a brief vacation from my depression. He glared at the tree before turning around. I quietly came out of the shadows and walked towards him. "I heard the plants only attack the strong." I was being sarcastic, but my voice was calm and steady, only hinting at the fact that I was in fact just kidding. She lets out a laugh, but it's not a normal laugh. It's a laugh of a defeated mare that has lost hope, and hat mare would be me.
I had been struggling with depression for a few days now, but it didn't seem to horribly bad today, yet it was still there. It haunted me, slowly encompassing my brain in it's dark clutch. I couldn't escape it, I tried to fight it, but now I just tried to live wit it-- as if it was some sort of part of me. This idea made me sad. I didn't want to have depression as a part of me, yet no matter how hard I fought... it always stuck around. Even though today may be slightly better, the dark thoughts were still there: suicide, death, pain, sadness. At first, I thought I was weak. I thought I was just being sad for myself, but it was more than that. Even though I see that now, I still don't know how to fight this everyday nightmare.
talk talk talk talk
oh, tell me, what's the matter?</style> |
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