With every step you take towards her, you tear down the steel wall that has been guarding your heart. You don’t mean to, but the rainbow of butterflies that flutter in your stomach and in the air demand it. The panels that have been surrounding it, giving it only enough room to beat the blood through your arteries, crack and crumble, turning to rust. The process should have taken eons- an eternity; the love that you feel and the trickery that the moon goddess plays on you now, though, speeds the process. The metal oxidizes, scatters to dust under its own weight, and slowly the red of your heart begins to show- and with it, the black of your soul. You love her, perhaps, but you are no knight in shining armor. You are the same crude man you have always been- the same crude man that you will always be. Love can break walls, but it cannot remold the most primal base of one’s personality.

You let her settle underneath your neck where she wants to be… where you wants her to be. Her warmth presses against your muddied hide, revealing bones pressing out where muscles should be covering them more thoroughly. The winter has not been kind to you. Not that any season is. Will she shy away? Will she realize what a farce this is and twist away from you, suddenly disgusted? You wonder this, for the briefest of instants, as a phantom pain on your skin brings evil back into your heart. But it is only a moment, and that instant cannot ruin all the glory around you. You push the pain away and push yourself closer to Snowflake.

Her scent as you inhale is intoxicating, her words an accent to the feelings that swell inside of you. It is spring, and you are a man, and the confessions of love, words blurted out without thought of the consequences, bring forward primal instincts. You begin nibbling along the crest of her neck, reminiscent of the night you spent in the caves not so long ago. Softly, you grumble into her ears, “I want you.” For once, you do not look around to see if anyone is watching. You do not worry about prying eyes, you do not fret if there are others. The magic sun, you’re sure, will keep you two safe. You are in a ray of light, your own special place, alone in the world… in your head, at least.

But for now you are gentle. You did not give her a choice last time. And though you almost do not give her a choice now, you manage to hold yourself in for a moment longer, waiting for her response.

@[Elsa]

we all look for ways to make the pain go away