Had no idea which board would be best to put this in, so here goes...

Caution: I sound like Mauja is an independent entity existing within my head. For all I care, he could be, as I do not claim to "control" my characters or impose my reasoning/actions upon them. He exists within my thoughts and when I write it is purely on instinct.

Those who have talked to me, about Helovia and especially about my character, probably knows that I have a sort of iffy relationship with Mauja. On one hand I love him dearly and writing him usually feels good.

And on the other, he is incredibly frustrating. Why?

Because he is depressed. He's been depressed since the fall of the Edge, which was around the time I first left, so fall/early winter 2012. That's 2 years, and the better part of the time I've been playing him. And depression takes a long time to cure, but for a really long time, neither he nor I understood what was going on. He's spent the better part of these years belittling himself and trying to "be what he can't be anymore", which, of course, just leads to more frustrations and a feeling of shortcomings.

And.. I mean, he is a rather depressing figure right now. His mind is unraveling more and more and in some ways he's really derailing, because he cannot hold it in/control it anymore. It also means that the reactions he gets from pretty much everyone, the ones who knew him or simply had some kind of idea of who he ought to be, aren't very nice/good most of the time. If you've ever been in this situation IRL you'll recognize that being told these things do not help. :D

So what I'm trying to say is.. I've been struggling with Mau's mental health for years. In a way, he's a reflection of me; his inability to let go of the Edge has been my inability to let go of Arvidsjaur, etc. His depression has reflected mine. But for the past half a year-year, my life's taken a turn for the better, and I've been feeling really alive, and happy. I just wish it'd rub off on him.

Anyway, I'm just.. I mean I don't want to "plot out" someone fixing him because I know that won't happen and I'm certainly not asking people to stop being disappointed in him IC because he's certainly BEING a disappointment, I'm just.. in some ways, sort of at my wits end, because after 2 years it gets kind of.. old, and frustrating. So I guess this is part rant, part.. I don't know, if anyone has any advice. :|

I'm so sorry to hear about your struggles with Mau :(

I've had a hard time with Windy too, so I know how it feels to have a love/hate relationship with your character. That's one reason why I decided to leave Helovia. Unfortunately I've tried to play him on other sites, but I fail as I feel like he belongs here.
That's why he's coming back with no clue who he is or what he's done. It's my way of giving him a chance to be the one he was born to be (I've messed him up badly from day one and I feel bad for it lol).

Maybe you could do something similar to Mau? :) Forgive-and-forget-sort-of-thing?

Well.. I just wrote a huge response and deleted it all by closing my internet by accident. Awesome.

To sum it up: I agree a hundred percent! It's crazy to see where our imaginations can lead and actually create a life. There are so many wonderful characters on here who's distinct personalities shine, and Mau is one of them. I wish I could give good advice on reviving him a little, but unfortunately my characters often share my emotions, so I haven't had to deal with one like that. :\

I do personally think that the amnesia thing is a little glorified and wouldn't dare to do it to one of my own characters, but that's just my opinion. It works very well for some others! <3

I think my best suggestion is to sit down and look at where he is and think about where you want to take him. And from there, find him a job he can put himself into. In other words, what still matters to him? Does anything? Surely there's something that is still important to Mauja, that has nothing to do with hanging on to the past and whatever failure that may entail. Find it, follow it, see where it leads?

In the past my solution to this sort of problem has been to... act finicky and have poor activity, though I usually got Nepdon out of his ruts by declaring war lmao :V I am not suggesting Mauja declare war on anyone. With Ruske I generally had to work to figure out what was important enough to him that he'd stick around in the world to see it out.

I am seconding Nev in that I have mixed feelings about bringing characters back with amnesia/significantly changed. I think it really only works if they've been gone for a significant portion of time and Mauja doesn't seem to have been that way?

Ultimately, in order to heal he needs to find some sort of.... thread within himself that says yes, Mauja is worth something and it is important to preserve him. Maybe a goal to work toward, or some sort of appreciation of.... something that makes him want to exist. How? I don't know; I don't know Mauja well at all. Good luck? xP

Sort of like depression in real life, it's not a sure set answer.

The best you can do is try to introduce him to so new faces, or old faces that actually enjoy his company (LIKE ONNI SHE WILL SMILE HIS FACE OFF).

A good way to break a rut is to toss him into new situations. Sure, we can wrestle with the idea that "Mauja would never do X, Y, and Z", but what absurd conditions would he do these things under? Seeing Mauja in some crazy situations would be entertaining for me, in the very least.

A lot of what happens on Helovia is negative because it's more dramatic, but you can find the positive. Maybe avoiding places where you know he's just going to get "more of the same" for a while.

^^ I can completely relate Neo.

I agree with Boom. That is pretty much how I revived depressed, frustrating Africa out of a hole (and inactivity)- I took her from normal and shoved her into a situation that would challenge every aspect of her monotonous life. She has really used Midas (old acquaintance) to re evaluate who she is and how she thinks - positively...