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05-02-2015, 03:38 AM
i am the vanguard of your destruction
[ LOL I just read this and that joke xDD ]
If I lay here
If I just lay here
Would you lie with me
And just forget the world?
He wasn't sure what he sought anymore, trapped there in the darkness of her embrace. Reassurance? Comfort? Just a safe place to hide away, and cry? Someone to shield the icy, fractured remains of his heart—from the world? So that the world would not see him mourn, and know that, yes, Mauja had loved.
Or was it to shield him from the world, so he could keep living behind his ice wall, hiding underneath the armor of careless indifference? He pressed his eyes shut a little tighter against the burning water seeping from them, a different kind of heat pushing itself out between his tear-stained lashes. Maybe.. maybe he was a monster only as long as he thought he was.
Had they been monsters? He and Psyche?
Once.. he thought they had; they had been dark and vindictive, poisonous plans spun from honeyed words and thrilling jabs, like wolves engaged in a playful jaw-wrestle. They had flirted with the darkness in the world, with the darkness in their souls, and with one another, slowly constructing an empire of dreams. They had.. he had.. he had knowingly destroyed part of Delinne's life, trying to justify it with saving her. But...
Both he and Psyche had had hearts. They had, in their own way, loved and lost and moved on, in so many different ways. She had changed, just as much as he had, but he hadn't caught the moment—he hadn't done what he could do figure out the new them. He had just.. failed to hold her, because he wasn't strong enough to hold on to shadows. He had been too weak to grasp the moment. It had all been his fault.
Then Sialia spoke and for a moment he was quiet and confused, not sure what she was getting at—but then he laughed, a short, harsh sound pulled from unwilling lungs. "Really," he managed to get out, the sound of his voice dry and brittle. It was hard to speak properly when you were weeping, even if it was nothing more but the slow, silent fall of tears.
But then he kind of forgot about everything—about Psyche, about himself, about crying and hugging and things... Because she spoke, and he felt an icy talon grip his heart. Anxiety settled like a sudden boot to the stomach, a wave of vertigo sweeping through and he thought he stopped breathing for a second before convincing himself to exhale again. "What?" he whispered, more terrified than he wanted to admit.
He hated it when someone told him they had things to say to him.
[ @[Sialia] ]
If I just lay here
Would you lie with me
And just forget the world?
He wasn't sure what he sought anymore, trapped there in the darkness of her embrace. Reassurance? Comfort? Just a safe place to hide away, and cry? Someone to shield the icy, fractured remains of his heart—from the world? So that the world would not see him mourn, and know that, yes, Mauja had loved.
Or was it to shield him from the world, so he could keep living behind his ice wall, hiding underneath the armor of careless indifference? He pressed his eyes shut a little tighter against the burning water seeping from them, a different kind of heat pushing itself out between his tear-stained lashes. Maybe.. maybe he was a monster only as long as he thought he was.
Had they been monsters? He and Psyche?
Once.. he thought they had; they had been dark and vindictive, poisonous plans spun from honeyed words and thrilling jabs, like wolves engaged in a playful jaw-wrestle. They had flirted with the darkness in the world, with the darkness in their souls, and with one another, slowly constructing an empire of dreams. They had.. he had.. he had knowingly destroyed part of Delinne's life, trying to justify it with saving her. But...
Both he and Psyche had had hearts. They had, in their own way, loved and lost and moved on, in so many different ways. She had changed, just as much as he had, but he hadn't caught the moment—he hadn't done what he could do figure out the new them. He had just.. failed to hold her, because he wasn't strong enough to hold on to shadows. He had been too weak to grasp the moment. It had all been his fault.
Then Sialia spoke and for a moment he was quiet and confused, not sure what she was getting at—but then he laughed, a short, harsh sound pulled from unwilling lungs. "Really," he managed to get out, the sound of his voice dry and brittle. It was hard to speak properly when you were weeping, even if it was nothing more but the slow, silent fall of tears.
But then he kind of forgot about everything—about Psyche, about himself, about crying and hugging and things... Because she spoke, and he felt an icy talon grip his heart. Anxiety settled like a sudden boot to the stomach, a wave of vertigo sweeping through and he thought he stopped breathing for a second before convincing himself to exhale again. "What?" he whispered, more terrified than he wanted to admit.
He hated it when someone told him they had things to say to him.
[ @[Sialia] ]
