the Rift


[PRIVATE] promises

Roskuld the Sparklight Posts: 424
World's Edge General atk: 7.5 | def: 9.5 | dam: 6
Mare :: Tribrid :: 15.3 :: 6 HP: 82 | Buff: ENDURE
Zchiraxicon :: Royal Rougarou :: Electric Smithers
#10


*"The last time we did this we were so small…remember?”*

I smiled as she lowered herself against me, settling down in the pit of hell sand with me. “Yeah…” I said, rough and preoccupied, cuz the absolute last time we had done something like this—I had woken up to a larger body and even larger confusion and, looking back on it now, it was probably the first real trauma of my life and thinking about that moment still sends chills down my spine and makes my stomach flip with a sick twist.

It wasn’t helping right now, either. Cuz there was a part of me that wanted me to focus on the sand digging into my side, to really feel the awfulness sinking into my skin, getting stuck in my joints ‘n shit, really, really feeling the burn and the horror of it all. But there was this other piece of my heart that I couldn’t control and it was wanting to bask in Jiji’s warmth and the way she smelled and the way her mane would get caught in my face and all up in my mouth if I wasn’t paying attention close enough. And that was painful anyway cuz it was making me remember about when we were so small and it was an awful feeling, a feeling of nostalgia and incredible loss I couldn’t let go of for the life of me. 

I draped my neck across her as she lay down, holding onto her and feeling her heartbeat as I tried calming the rising bile in my stomach. We were supposed to be going to sleep; she didn’t need to know that was a thing that was hard for me to grasp right now. 

“…hey,” I asked in a low voice, grumbling against her skin as I finally let those memories of our childhood wash over me, “What…what do you think would’ve happened if…” The question got stuck, or maybe I just wasn’t sure how to build it right, “If I…if…y’know…Pa wasn’t—“

--a GOD--

--a rapist--

--a user--

“…y’know, Pa? And I hoped she’d know what I meant. I really, really didn’t want to explain these things to her and relive them in that kind of detail.  I just wanted to sleep. I just wanted her to sleep. Cuz—y’know, she needed it.



[yay for broken table codes YAY]



talk

Like stars burning holes right through the dark
Flicking fire like saltwater into my eyes</style>




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Messages In This Thread
promises - by Ranjiri - 06-22-2015, 11:48 AM
RE: promises - by Roskuld - 06-23-2015, 10:30 AM
RE: promises - by Ranjiri - 06-23-2015, 11:44 AM
RE: promises - by Roskuld - 06-25-2015, 12:47 PM
RE: promises - by Ranjiri - 06-26-2015, 12:39 AM
RE: promises - by Roskuld - 07-23-2015, 01:41 AM
RE: promises - by Roskuld - 07-29-2015, 11:35 AM
RE: promises - by Ranjiri - 08-07-2015, 12:07 PM
RE: promises - by Roskuld - 08-11-2015, 12:06 PM
RE: promises - by Ranjiri - 08-11-2015, 09:10 PM

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