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Let me in
I'll show you how the world really is
I'll show you how the world really is
Crack. Miseal was no more. He had been replaced by a monster, the beast that had only run free once before was now dancing wickedly in caramel lanterns. Miseal feared nothing but this, this was the only thing that he truly did fear. He had to leave, now. Before he did something he never meant, hurt someone he never wanted to be hurt by his hand, did something that was unforgivable. All this was just a wrong move away, the beast that walked in a striped shell was unpredictable, sinister, despicable. He was capable of ripping out jugulars, but what was worse, was that this monstrosity was capable of destroying one's sanity. He could drive those so deep into a blackened abyss, that their return would only mean their death. He had to go.
He remembered now, the memories quickly flooded his thoughts. There was blood everywhere, and as he looked down, he saw the golds of his hooves covered with the crimsons of others. This was the part of his childhood that he wasn't supposed to remember, he wasn't supposed to know what he had done--and what he could do. He realized now that this childhood accident was no accident, no. It was a plan manifested under the works of his parents, who their faces he didn't even recall. But their voices haunted him now, crying out for him to contain himself, for the sake of himself and her; Enna. He snapped out of his delirium then, as her name was all he could think of. The chromes of the sun refocused on Enna, shielded by the golden boy who was much better for her then he could ever be. Monsters didn't deserve happiness, companionship, Miseal deserved to be alone. It was the only thing that seemed right.
The creature pinched his eyes closed, one could see the deep pain beneath them before he covered it up with blue veils. He blocked out the words of the antlered stallion, as he begun to turn away from himself, his beast, Enna. If he was no longer of matter to the moon draped fae, the least he could do was protect her for one last time. Never would he have guessed that it was from himself. He saw her, crippled in the sands as the world became too much for her to bare, and then he saw himself, ever-viligant, laying beside her. A knight in the disparity that was her fears and pains. It meant nothing now. Go Miseal. Leave. And never turn back. Before he turned to leave, he asked a simple question, words stale, cold, icy, unreachable and distant. "Who did this?"
His departure wasn't as easy as hoped. Eyes flew open as the buck spoke again, and in that moment, the strongest of containments were now useless. Miseal didn't have anything left in him to fight--this was a war that he was not prepared to win. He let himself go, against his desires, Miseal was but a mammal stuck screaming in a shell stolen by his own demons. His eyes narrowed as the changed monster slowly turned, his muscles tensing with an anger not of this world, an anger that didn't belong in this world, or in him.
I'm sorry you have to see what I never wanted you or anyone to see.
"I do not need to explain myself to you." He spoke then with chords no longer of a hiss, but rather a venomous strike, lethal in it's traces. "-And, because you wanted to know. I am Miseal, and I can question any low life man that I wish. You do not scare me boy." He fumed, his chest was swelled with the rage that danced and cried within, his nostrils flaring and eyes wickedly dangerous. His ear twitched at the sound of his name on her lips, there was no anger about it, no hatred. Only pain, pain that he caused. How was it possible that she did not match the anger that ran within in his veins he did not know, neither did he care. She meant nothing to this Miseal. Not now, not ever.
Enna exploded then, each sentence inflicting more and more pain, anger, brokenness into the pair. If he was himself, Miseal would've backed off, would've realized that Enna was destroyed, and that he needed to just go. To leave her and the man who had replaced him be, let them wallow in their pities, which were completely allowed, and never turn his crowned head back to the antlered mare who was too good for him. Life wasn't that easy though, and this side of him would not just let it go, no matter how hard the real him wished differently.
"Remember this then."
Oh no. Oh yes. His boiling blood did not calm, and his orbs easily shown his thoughts. Gold clashed with the paleness that was Enna's moonlit lanterns, and then a sinister smirk dripped off his lips as he looked at the body of the foal. He strided towards her side, the corpse's eyes closed, dead before she got to see the lights of the world. No this isn't who I am, no, don't do it. Miseal fought with himself, trying to control a side he had met only once before.
But this is who you are.
And with that, Miseal lowered his head, grabbed the foal with his teeth, it's limp body dangling in blunt dentures. He didn't hesitate, but only looked within the whites of Enna, to see her reaction as her legacy was tossed away with the lips of a monster. A smile was easily seen underneath the black fur that filled his mouth, monsters weren't those who hid in the dark, no. Monsters were those who weren't afraid of the light of day, they were Miseal. The beast peered once more in her windows, he could see the tears that threatened--and did-- spill from those pale gems, and he resurfaced again. He was him again, well, some version of him. Not even the once untouchable Miseal could return from the darkness unscathed. That was the thing about the dark side, it changed everyone. You would be lying to yourself to think otherwise.
It all hit him at once, his golden orbs lay shattered, broken and confused. His brow furrowed, as he looked around, lost in his dwindling anger. Oh god. Instantly the filly dropped from his mouth, falling in a heap at his feet. He couldn't look at her, he couldn't see what he did to her, couldn't look at the buck to see the surprise and anger, couldn't look at the man that should've been him. How did you allow yourself to do this to her? Especially now? Miseal knew, maybe better then any other that Enna was a basket case, she was already unstable underneath the strains of her past, her present, her future, and he allowed himself to release something unearthly, now?
Miseal dared raise his eyes from their place on the ground, he backed away as he mouthed two sincere words, his voice not able to reach him.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry for the pain I caused, for all that I've done.
He turned slowly and sadly, pillars extending as he walked back to where he came. The shadows slowly absorbed him, as he left the casualties where the obstruction was to be no more. He was to be no more.
"Talk?"
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