Ilaria hisses right back at Hobgoblin, her thick tail swinging catlike over Cera's shoulder. She has the soul of a medic and a caregiver, but an iron will that even Cera cannot bend at times. Stop, Cera commands, though his eyes do not leave Sikeax even as his head hangs just a touch lower than hers if only for the sake of showing his grief over what he'd done to her. Submission in its subtlest form. She could have sought you out too, and her companion has no right to judge you, she snapped right back, and Cera gave a soft sigh that expanded his thin frame and deflated him just as quickly. Luckily, or unluckily, Ilaria was distracted from her cause by Hobgoblin sinking his talons into Sikeax, drawing forth a shuddering wince that had Ilaria leaping into action. She slid down Cera's leg and ran on soft paws over to Sikeax, seeking to touch her and use her healing magic, a soft unhappy noise thrumming in her throat as intense hazel eyes narrowed at the other companion. Companions do not HURT their BONDED! It was like a screaming tornado of fire inside Cera's head, intense enough that his ears flattened and his eyes crinkled against the noise that only he could hear. You also do not have claws, he pointed out weakly, for even he wasn't sure how far this went. 

The silence was prolonged between them, and Cera's discomfort grew alongside Ilaria's disgust until he was torn. He wanted to defend himself, but how could he when he was here asking for forgiveness? It was so incredibly backwards. How could he barb and sharpen his tongue against her, when he was intending to apologize? But he wanted to, because he could feel in some way the dull hatred aimed his way. His wings shuffled and jerked against his will, for he'd always been far too connected to his heart, incapable of hiding every emotion he ever felt. It had always felt like lying, and Cera had always held intense disdain for that particular vice. 

When she did finally speak, Ilaria finally retreated to Cera's hoof, curling herself and staring balefully at Hobgoblin. His cheek twitched with all the words he wanted to say, but he instead turned his head away from her and took a deep breath. It would do no good really. Heated words had always screwed things up for him, it was why he'd vowed to rid himself of the darkness that had plagued him for countless seasons. A child of the light may have the ability to leash and use the flames of their sign and element, but it did not mean they should. Even his Lord had fallen to that, back when he'd burned the world and been cast down as surely as his sister had been. Cera would learn from that example. 

Sikeax was his friend. Whether she saw that or not...and it hit him like a flare of brilliance in his brain exactly what he needed to do, what he needed to say. As if aware he would move before he made the conscious decision to, Ilaria unwound from his ankle and sat poised on the sand, watching him with big, intelligent eyes. 

Cera moved a few steps closer to Sikeax, dipping his head to each shoulder where faint scars from the cat he'd saved her from still resided. They were not nearly as noticeable as his other scars, but they still existed. Like written words on the pages of his skin that reminded him that he led a life worth living. One that included Sikeax. 

"I notice you. I always have. The others? The herd? They may be blind to you but I am not. I wear the proof of my feelings for you, and even you cannot deny them, regardless of how I failed you." Ilaria huffed inside his head at that, their bond twinging with disapproval, but Cera ignored that the best he could. You failed nobody. You are mortal, you have feelings. You are the foremost important thing, you had to take care of yourself first before you could ever help her. She is being selfish. Cera shoved her from his mind, knowing she would always defend him first, and he could not handle that right now. Not when he needed to be defending Sikeax, showing her how he felt. 

"I abandoned everybody. I needed to take care of myself before I could ever take care of you, because if I came to you again in that state, I would have been taking advantage of you and your kindness. But you are not invisible, and you never will be. I accept my faults, and I hope to prove that I deserve the forgiveness you've given me..." that was what was important, that she forgave him at all, still saw him as a potential friend. "You will always be my friend, even if you never forgive me. And I will wear these proudly until the day I meet the Gods." Emerald eyes flashed as he lifted them to tired blues, knowing there was nothing else he could say to try and prove himself to her.