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06-22-2016, 02:51 PM
Let me tell you a tale, -- fluff
Of a queen that was born, -- gender reference, 'queen' being a female
-1 | given that she has NO royal lineage, I found this misleading. While it's true that queens are traditionally female, first and foremost it's a ranked position, of which this character has no relation.
In the ruins of something once great, -- as on profile, Pyrene was born in the ruins of a temple, history reference
+1 | history
But you were not alone, were you? -- has a twin, lineage reference
+1 | Nice! Lineage ref
The lavender dances in your eyes, -- purple eyes, appearance reference
+1 | Appearance
You can't speak to others like you should or could, -- as on profile, finds it hard to hold conversations
-1 | CAN'T speak is VERY different from finding it hard to hold conversations.
Poor little thing,
-1 | 15.3 isn't little. I know this wasn't meant to be a clue, but even fluff can count against you if it's misleading!
The only gold that resembles a queen is what she bears on her body, -- appearance reference to the gold plated horns
+1 | Appearance
Not a queen really...
1/3 is a fail from me.
Of a queen that was born, -- gender reference, 'queen' being a female
-1 | given that she has NO royal lineage, I found this misleading. While it's true that queens are traditionally female, first and foremost it's a ranked position, of which this character has no relation.
In the ruins of something once great, -- as on profile, Pyrene was born in the ruins of a temple, history reference
+1 | history
But you were not alone, were you? -- has a twin, lineage reference
+1 | Nice! Lineage ref
The lavender dances in your eyes, -- purple eyes, appearance reference
+1 | Appearance
You can't speak to others like you should or could, -- as on profile, finds it hard to hold conversations
-1 | CAN'T speak is VERY different from finding it hard to hold conversations.
Poor little thing,
-1 | 15.3 isn't little. I know this wasn't meant to be a clue, but even fluff can count against you if it's misleading!
The only gold that resembles a queen is what she bears on her body, -- appearance reference to the gold plated horns
+1 | Appearance
Not a queen really...
1/3 is a fail from me.
