|
Earth eyes star blindly forward. They were not here, not in this place. They instead danced among the shadows on the way, grown large by the dull glow of the trees about them. In the shadows he drifted, helplessly carried by his imagination, by the ghosts which ruled there. He had no more defenses. The roaring storm, the hurricane within his mind had fallen to pieces on the floor, like shattered glass in his hands. He could not distract himself from the sway of the darkest thoughts. He could not box them up, or push them off to other reasons. They were here. Just as his robes were shredded before the gilded mare’s eyes, so too were those he veiled the faces in. The veils of lies, of devotion. In those tender moments where he nursed the pain, where he pulled the white ghost forward, he had kept the truth in her eyes covered in the promises of the forever that could never be. Now those too were torn away.
A warm touch comes against his neck, and words whisper in, but the gold is caught in the crosshairs of the consequences of his reveal. He had pulled away the shroud to show the gilded mare, and now he too had to look upon her deathly face. Is this how she hoped to achieve his happiness? A bitter choke held his tongue. And all the rest was muted in his exhaustion. Only the earth eyes, captivated by the shadows beyond twisted, narrowing. The breath against his neck rolls again as she speaks, and he listens. The world too gone and dead to rise up any more walls against words, against thoughts, and against feelings.
Her words do not give immediate ease. Like alcohol it stings as she pours them over. But he was could not pull away, he could not rise to leave or lash out as he had done so many others. When all others had turned and left with wounded prides, she was staying. She alone was actually taking on the burden to ease his. Painful though it was for the both of them. Rarely do you feel how heavy your burden is until it is temporarily lifted. And the sudden rush of relief is often greeted with dread at knowing it would soon descend again.
At father the first sign of life comes through and the gold flinches. But he listens ever still. His world moved at another speed, and within a blink she was no longer standing. Earth eyes confused leave the shadow world to see her next to him, lying beside him, her face turning back to him. His eyes meeting hers. Revealing just how fragile the little life his had left in this truth telling soul he had. They are ever distrustful, but now that all had been pulled away the weaknesses, and scars revealed their claims to any strength were clearly false. She goes on and his eyes narrow, but at the sound of her name, Arwen’s name, from another’s lips, the gold can’t hold the gaze any longer. His head drops to the side and away. It was the first time he had heard it in so long. And it, cloaked in a foreign accent of another, lost in a land far from where it belonged, was like the writing upon a tombstone. Another nail in a coffin.
He dared not answer he question, but he was helpless to reject it and all it caused. What would Arwen want…It almost made him smile, but for the agony of reality. Arwen was just as jealous as he. Her love just as violent and possessive. His fingers reached out to the ghost, tracing the cold cheeks and lips. Hearing in his ears just how hot her temper would is- was…Another nail slammed unforgivingly into the windowed coffin. She wouldn’t have wanted any of this. That is beside the point. New thoughts come sweeping in under the guise of the one beside him. It did happen…Another nail in the wood. Arwen had been ever the ruler of his heart…but had she wanted him to be happy? When she stood over him, or when she pulled him to the side to sneak into some outlandish plot, had it been as selfish as he always imagined…or more. The tables then turned on him. He had done so for her. He had promised her the world to see her smile…was she the same. “Yes.” The gold head drops slightly more, the lids of his eyes growing heavy.
The last wisps which held his head up and his mind rolling were fading. So he listened still as she went on. Some faint smoke of reaction stirs in his chest at her continued tale. Some pity….some anger…but they were all yet nothing but faint airs in this state. Nothing to react on, or move with. It dragged is soul slightly deeper in the mud….to be so helpless.
There’s no justice in the world. Harks flick. There was only the justice you could make. But his body was beyond words. Her head turns to him and his gaze flicks to her. Her words like an outstretched hand reaching to pull him from this tangled web of brokenness. Arwen’s name cuts through him again, but so does her promise. The tired head tilts. She would….The idea fogs his senses. But then…he doesn’t try to fan it away. He doesn’t run through it…
Promises were fickle things, and no one knew that more so than the gold. “I don’t know if I-” It was so instinctive, so reactionary. To nurse the scars, to hide them but prick the skin to feel still the nerves they wounded…it was all the gold had ever thought he wanted. The idea of carrying such things, but no longer remembering their sting sounded….impossible. But Rexanna. A long sigh shuttered out from him, the last of everything he could give. There were other futures waiting….Other figures slipping around the hallowed halls of his mind. And he wanted to let them in. To give rest at the vigilance he kept over the now revealed cold body. To at least let another take a turn in guarded a piece of his lost heart. So it came as a whisper, a last breath. “I need you...” His eyes closed, and his head dropped to her knees, resting there if she allowed. He body going limp against hers. He had to try…for there was no going on like this. He couldn’t keep up like this. "I'll try." It was a promise it could not keep...at least not alone.
The gold fell asleep as he allowed for the first time, another to take the midnight watch.
OOC::<333
|
.svg/2000px-Google_Chrome_icon_(2011).svg.png){kind=icon}
![[Image: 5381546acbe33]](http://images.helovia.net/index.php/view/5381546acbe33)
