so i listen to the    wind for an answer

The gift, such a small thing in a world of magic and fantasy and impossible things, is almost more than she can bear. For a moment, she’s watching others gathering, nodding and smiling to friends. Yael catches her eye, and she gives the little golden mare a particularly large smile, glad to see her here as well. Remembering just how she felt in Yael’s shoes a year ago. Lyanna’s about to move to join the golden mare, but then the turtle is laughing and handing out gifts.

It shouldn’t be anything, but it’s so similar to a piece of jewelry her mother had that she nearly cries. Stop it, she thinks, knowing she can’t just break down crying in the middle of a giant group over an arm band. It’s just a piece of jewelry. Ah, but it reminds her of her mother. Reminds her that her family was killed over a year ago and she didn’t even stop to mourn them on the day they died.

How could she forget such a thing?

But she had. She’d forgotten. Not forgotten them, but she hadn’t marked the day of their passing. She’d been too busy living, too absorbed in her own life to even think of it. Was that a good thing? Was it a sign she was moving on? Or was it a bad thing? Was she simply forgetting them? The sound of Corbin’s voice – did it sound like what she still heard, or had it changed in her head? The distinct features of her mother’s face, or the way her father’s laugh rumbled.

She is thankful for the distraction as the tree begins to glow, the joy and cheer literally spilling into her. Slowly, a smile comes to her face, though her heart still reels as she slips the armband onto her foreleg. Mom, she thinks, though perhaps due only to the tree’s infectious cheer, manages to keep herself together. Instead, she turns her attention back to the crowd, looking again for familiar faces. It’s then that she catches sight of Yael, side-stepping away from something –she can’t tell what. Just that her friend looks upset.

Slipping through the group of horses, she tries to make her way to @Yael, hoping everything is okay. “Yael?” she calls, the ruby on her armband glinting against the snow. But at least, for the moment, she can distract herself doing the one thing she seems to be good at – caring for others. Perhaps she cares selfishly – it keeps her mind off herself, off the things she has lost. But she does care.

lyanna