Painful Expectations

Painful Expectations | Zikar-Sin

Tolio Posts: 110

Deceased

Stallion :: Unicorn :: 17.3hh :: 6 Years 8 Months Buff: NOVICE

Brit

01-11-2013, 09:19 PM

T o l i o
more than meets the eye

Over the years, Tolio had been frequently informed that he had a bit of a problem with surprising others far too often. He was eccentric, oblivious to the boundaries that people observed throughout their lives. Having had free reign his entire childhood; social norms and even small things such as personal space had no place in his brain. It had only furthered the strange looks others gave him, though his heart had weathered every comment against his sexuality. You meet one smart ass, you’ve met them all. They were surprisingly uncreative and uninventive in their insults. It merely amused him at his age. It’s not like he chased the tail of every stallion he met! Inwardly sniffing at the insult brought to mind, he drifted off into his own thoughts, though he was still half paying attention to Zikar-Sin. His shocked expression only made the giggling increase until he could hardly breathe. He was simply adorable, and Tolio was a sucker for adorable things. The shadowed brute stared at him, nearly gawking. Eyes wide and face in a comical array of surprise. Tolio merely tried to stifle the pealing tones of laughter that refused to stop, eyes sparkling with mirth. It was amusing to surprise people in such a manner, and he absolutely loved Zikar-Sin’s reaction. Blinking owlishly, he almost felt the need to coo over him. Waiting patiently with a sly smile, as if teasing him. Still soft as ever, as if physically unable to appear sinister in any way. His face was too boyish, too vibrant with emotions. Too easily read to ever appear in a fashion other than kind.

Reply came after a moment of stumbling through words that wouldn’t be completed. Even going so far as to close his handsome irises and shake crown as if to rid himself of pestering thoughts. And at last Tolio received his reply. Cheering joyfully, crimson tail swayed against his legs and pillars danced in the snow like a small child being told that they could play. Tolio had few nicknames, of them being ‘Toto’ and ‘Lio’. Not very creative, in his opinion. Then again Zikar-Sin’s name was just as hard to create nicknames out of, and Sinny was a rather popular one to be thought of. Even so, joy is cut short at a shiver that crawls up his spine like a branch drifting teasingly up his body when walking through the forest at night. Tolio instinctively knows that it is abnormal, and his core shakes with the need to get away. But he doesn’t feel fear in the present time. Something is familiar about it. Mercury eyes sweep the snow almost desperately. He doesn’t know what drives him, what tells him to look around. Why he’s desperate to find something at all. It’s like a faded memory, frayed at the edges and worn through care and time. A slip of paper folded in the back pocket of his mind. Zikar-Sin has disappeared from consciousness, and it’s then that he sees it. A flicker. Hardly enough time to register what it is. But he knows. All he needs is that brief image, and that faded little paper is suddenly brand new again. It’s a unicorn, that much is obvious and the first thing he recognizes out of the wraith. But the spots, the scars, the stature. Tolio recognizes it. Recognizes him. Even if it’s hardly discernible, even if the sky can be seen clearly through a figure not meant to be so ghost-like.

It had to be Mauja.

Before he could help it one crimson leg has taken a step towards the place where the image had appeared. Face crumpled, feeling as if he’d been struck in the chest hard enough to remove all air from his lungs. He wishes to race after that flicker of a picture, to call out like a possessed person to that stallion. Mauja. Mauja. Mauja. His mind refuses to let him believe that it’s merely a trick of the eyes, because Tolio simply has to hold on to the hope that Mauja is still alive. Still around. Mauja was his King. Psyche would never take his place, even if he’d knelt on knee to her coal form. Mauja was his ruler. If it came down to Psyche and Mauja, Tolio wouldn’t hesitate even a millisecond before stepping up to aid the FrostHeart. Tolio had sworn his very soul to that stallion, and he would not give that link over to Psyche. Not in a thousand years. Mauja had been a good, firm leader. In that moment he wishes that Mauja had remained. Hadn’t simply disappeared off the face of the planet like wind playing with the snow. He wishes that he could ask him what to do, because he took Mauja’s word as law. Beg him to lead him, tell him what to do in this mess he’d caught himself up in. It’s like his legs are tangled in barbwire, and his heart tells him that his King would have helped him out of it.

Then again, perhaps that is simply Tolio’s fierce loyalty speaking. He’d never believed so fiercely in someone before, and waited every day for their King to return.

”Mauja…”

Name slips unbidden from his maw, hardly a whisper. Full of emotion, longing and a passion that burns brighter than the fires in Helovia’s heart. His loyalty to Mauja will remain, even after he is dead. But remembering him means remembering his situation with Psyche and the creature she has created, and it hurts him all the same. Makes him wish for things that simply will never happen.

Zikar-Sin breaks him from staring off at the place where Mauja’s image appeared. Flustered he broke away and returned his gaze to the other unicorn. His incredulous words inform him that Sinny, too, saw the flicker of the ghost that had the ability to save Tolio’s sanity. ”I…yes…” whispering a bit breathlessly, eyes alive with shock. As if having truly seen a ghost. Is this just a mockery of the Gods, to dangle the image of the one Tolio needed to return before him? Was Mauja truly dead, and this was just some sort of game? Walls went up around Tolio’s already crumpled heart, refusing to allow that thought to take seed. He would always wait for Mauja, like the faithful soldier he was.

Soft, relieved smile broke through the heavy emotions on Tolio’s visage. Even more relieved is the laughter that follows. ”I’m surprised you didn’t turn tail and run! I’m afraid that most people find my happiness a bit excessive,” he admitted sheepishly, shyly. Afraid that Zikar-Sin would judge him for being such a bright soul in such a dark shadow of a herd. That he would be like the others and judge him. He feared it more than anything in the world, because he truly liked the stallion.