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03-14-2013, 03:23 PM
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I am watching Note's eyes as he greets our sole daughter, and for a moment I think I see a shade of sadness. Of course I know that he is as devastated as I am, but he has shown so much more strength than I throughout the entire process. It is not often that I feel that I can see through his happy charade, but at this moment, I feel that he is sharing in my pain. I still cannot fathom how the one daughter emerged from the womb as healthy as can be, and yet the other emerged lifeless. It simply does not make sense to me. A part of me wants to fall to my knees, cry my fury to the gods, ask them why they would take my child from me - but I have seen the glory that is the gods, at least that of the Sun God, and I cannot bring myself to blame them. I touch my maw to Note's shoulder, a gesture of understanding and empathy; my eyes are, for a moment, haunted, and then the emotion is gone, fleeting as they all are, these days. Note's smile goes a long way toward healing my heart, though, and I return it timidly before chuckling at our daughter's antics. She cannot seem to decide whether she is more curious or afraid, her tiny cranium poking out from beneath my belly. And Sabel, the cat perched on my mate's nape, seems just as curious. For a moment, motherly instinct flares, and I worry that the predator sees our child as a meal; but Note would not have brought her near if that were the case, and I dismiss my irrational nerves. I watch with amusement as Note lowers his head, the kitten crawling its way onto his nose. He is clearly trying to coax Skysong out, and is probably teaching his companion that we are family at the same time. I have seen bonded ones before, though I have never had my own, and I wonder what it is like to share such an intimate bond. Still, I don't wonder enough to find out for myself, though I would imagine that a companion would be good protection for our child. I mull the thought over, wondering if perhaps Skysong ought to have a bonded friend, and if I can even make that decision for her. Probably not. As Note said, the companion found him, not the other way around. |
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"Talk talk talk." |
| Sohalia Don't wanna leave this life knowing I barely tried... |
