^{your heart is an empty room}

Within the thick trees, the sparse wildflowers, the sting of salty air, this place, it had quickly become like a second nature to you. The unfamiliarity and newness had been a breath of fresh air to your stagnant life, plagued with memories of better times and lovelier things, compared to the stand-still you had been stuck in for too long. Where there was nothing, nothing but yourself and the things you failed to cherish as you should have, there is new purpose. Xanthos had described this place as home, the creatures living in it as family. And though you hadn't a single clue of what it had meant then, things had grown almost too clear. There is a strange burning in your chest as you recall the moment that it felt like you had finally learned to see, despite all those times when you had been a child, learning, watching, waiting——but it is not like the burning that you have always felt before. Instead it is release, warmth, comfort; it is something that you have finally begun to understand, despite your foolishness in believing you had known it before: love.

You smirk, shrugging the notion from your thin shoulders, shirking the idea like you always had before, but your heart catches it, cradles it close, to nourish, to fill in the gaps and cavities that had been born of the boy and his sheep skin, hiding wolf-teeth, the man that was nothing more than a ghost——shadows and dust. Even if you cannot fully understand it still, fully know it, the way you once would have killed for, the meager grasp you have is held with an iron grip, long fingers, never to be lost, never to be let go. 'T-Thor, mister Thor?' It is within moments of a half-hearted search that you find her, her slight body riddled with youth surprising you. She shivers and shies at every sound, every movement, and while the part of you lacking maternal instinct, deprived still of a sense of decency and benevolence, wants to tell her the things she should be afraid of, you smile warmly as you can in an attempt to quell her fears, flicking heavy hair from your lily-white face carved from marble. 'Who might you be?' You pause in front of her, several arm's-lengths away from her fragile bones, young and small, your expression, aside from the lingering smile, as impassive as ever.


* so uh. this went downhill quickly. <_____<
i blame my boyfriend for making me want to watch LotR.

Had my heart turned into an empty room or was I simply standing still when the entire world was passing around me? I could look all around and still feel as if time was changing while I stayed the same. I couldn’t name how I felt, couldn’t see where I was going… What was wrong with me? I was standing at the edge of a storm that was heading toward my heart, even if I didn’t know it yet. The wind carried a message within the folds and I struggled many times over to understand what it meant. Even the constant thrumming of my essence against my will was causing havoc from within that often reverberated outward. I was shaky with the force of unknowing and all I knew was that, in time, all of these emotions would reveal the source of my pain. Everything would end in one way or another.

I had been wandering throughout the Edge for days now, restless and anxious. My lack of sleep was seemingly getting to me because I couldn’t handle the pounding of my thoughts against my skull. However, the sound of the sea still seemed to soothe me at times. In those times, I would stand to listen to the muted rushing of the waves. I wondered what it would feel like to have them crash against my legs, my face, let them swallow me whole. Would I find freedom within its deathly grip or would I find only panic, the very same thing I sought to escape? However, mild tones reached up above the roaring not only in the Edge but in my heart and wrestled me from my frantic daydreaming. I recognized her voice instantly and thought quickly back to the little rusty filly from the Threshold. As I recalled, her name had been Red Baron, Baron for short and ever since my rise to the throne, I hadn’t seen her much.

However, seeing her now was such a relief. She appeared to be overwhelmed and perhaps I had expected as much but before I could go to her, a pallid mare with artfully tousled ebony tresses beat me to the chase. Both females were new to the Edge, one so young, and the other merely young at heart. I smiled at her approach and decided to wait in the shadows for the perfect time to intervene. I wanted more than anything to see this Mikali in action after meeting her upon her arrival from the claiming grounds. I was still slightly irked by her beauty but her kindness was enough to distract me from her certain… allure. My heart plunged slightly at the thought of such blasphemy because Tamira was always ever pressing upon my mind, but I hadn’t seen her in nearly a week. Surely there was something going on that was ailing her. I only wished that I could find out what it was before I drove myself to the brink of insanity.

For I was nothing without her love and tender caress.

Many moments passed in which I found myself locked within the captive thoughts of my mate before I realized that the situation unfolding before me was now in need of my attentions. I was reluctant to tear myself away from Tamira, but there was nothing that I could do to stay any longer within her warm gaze. It was something that often sustained me in the midst of the cold nights… I wanted more than anything for her to reconcile her reservations and find me again. I needed her to find me again.

“Baron, you’ve no reason to fear the Edge, you are now among family… This is your home not a prison.” I looked down into the filly’s wide eyes as I approached from my perch. They were filled with questions that seemed to go unanswered and further more unasked. The girl had resonated with me and given me great satisfaction upon coming to the Edge with me. I had taken her from the clutches of the Grey and now that I had done as much, I was more than proud to guide her away from their ruin. Turning to Mikali, I nodded slowly. I was thankful for her attentions to the filly in my absence; she was certainly becoming a great asset to my herd, my family, still obviously shared with Mirage. The thought of her brought a sense of comfort to my heart knowing that I had found such a friend in her as well as a wonderful presiding equal. “Mikali, I trust you have fared well. Would you say that you’ve found the Edge to your liking?” There were so many formalities as of late… I only hoped that everyone would see me for what I was- true.

Thor

^{your heart is an empty room}

'Speaking of rude,' a murmur, a low hiss, jagged and piercing against the web of safety surrounding us; poisoned with a passion that swerves through tangled veins, burning, itching, destroying. Your impassiveness shifts to something dangerous, gaze sharpening with feral hunger, primordial and raw. She tears you down, and while you rise in defiance, there is hurt throbbing within your rabbit heart, vulnerable and all too fragile. Anger lies just beneath your skin, seeping into avian-bones, caustic and unfamiliar; you had always had something akin to patience, though not quite, you had always held yourself above where others would stoop. And yet she sits there, looking at you as if you were an insect that deserves nothing more than to be squished beneath her dainty little feet; something that you can only relate to him. Through a hazy mind you recall the look on his face, the way he threw them at you with the weight that he had carried from your lies, the conviction which he had held at your throat all this time; the way he looked at you, as she looks at you now. Your stomach turns, head rising as you look down at her with the same weight, the same judgment, only a different shade——your anger multiplying where it should fade, a terrible sensation rising from your gut as those same thoughts of instilling fear resonate and flourish.

'Forget it.'

You growl, muscles flexing to turn from the naïve, delusional girl to finish the exploration that she had done little more than interrupt. It is then that a familiar voice catches your attentions, eyes shooting to the corners of their sockets in acknowledgement of the man that you had so briefly met. You hadn't ever been one for social gatherings of the like, nor keeping such ill company, but a part of you is undoubtedly grateful ( and the thought strange, for you had never truly experienced relief ) for his genteel presence. But he speaks to her of family, and with your weak grasp of the meaning of the word, you fight to hold back a snort of disagreement, the pointed edges of your eye flickering back to the girl colored of rust. You would judge her, like no one had done to you since your arrival, though your encounters few, if you were only able of truly being cruel, idiotic even. You inhale deeply as the clay man speaks to you, doing your best to abolish the anger still surging electrically through you, though your gaze remains unwavering. 'Always.'

It is quick and precise, a rush of breath as it leaves your lungs begrudgingly, breaking your death-stare to look Thor over once, a flicker of a smile whispering along your lips. There is something on his face that speaks of a chronic tiredness, a weariness that you can only attribute to the responsibilities of leading as he has.

'And you, my Gentle-heart?'


;_______;

The tension was palpable between the two and for a moment, I couldn’t help the smile that worked its way from my stomach and onto my lips. It was the sudden bubbling of laughter threatening to overwhelm me that turned my face from the pair. I didn’t understand why they had already gotten off to the wrong foot but I was more than willing to see it stopped, at least after I got over the humor of such a predicament. Baron certainly had an attitude when it came to other mares, or perhaps it was just that I’d never noticed it before. Whatever the case, I moved forward to try and establish a bit of authority over the situation. I didn’t need their squabbling in the midst of everything else going on in the Edge. Or maybe it wasn’t so much everything going on in the Edge as much as everything going on in my mind. Blame it on my hectic emotions, but I just couldn’t stand to sit idly by as Mikali and Baron tried to duke it out in the name of simple introduction.

“Is this necessary?” I gave a pointed look to each girl, hoping to make my point before things got out of hand. I wasn’t sure what I would do if either smarted back, but unless they wanted to deal with the ramifications, I doubted I’d hear much protest.

Seeing that Baron was content in simply watching us squirm, I turned a questioning gaze to Mikali in hopes of finding out what exactly perturbed her. I didn’t want her to feel discouraged in her first few days in the Edge- how good would that look upon my just rising to the position of WeyrLeader? What on earth was I doing wrong here? “I do believe that I was much better a few moments ago.” A sly wink was given to the silvery mare before looking back to Baron who looked as if she’s once again settled. However, her confusion made me believe that I’d also misjudged her entirely… Fearful she was not. No, she was certainly quite the opposite.

I really wasn’t getting anywhere was I?

Mares, they had a way of twisting things so far out of proportion that I didn’t know how to cope. In the odd chance that I found myself one on one (which really hadn’t been all that odd as of late) they were often quite intellectual creatures, but of course, now I stood in the firing line of all things estrogen. And believe me, it was beyond my grasp.

“I don’t suppose you two would care to accompany for a stroll?” This could go one of two ways: breakthrough or catastrophe. I could only pray for the latter.