GAUCHO
Realism [+4]
I love the comparison that Gaucho goes over regarding his and Levi's respective strengths, weaknesses, and changes. You handled the critical hit wonderfully, with a beautiful description of the leg injury. You also had a continuous consideration of the weather as well as considerations regarding your opponent - such as the opponent tricking him. Overall, I think you have a very firm grasp on realism and Gaucho's experience shows through really well in your fights.


Emotion [+2]
"Nickering rather oafishly towards the snake - possibly the most affectionate sound he has ever to this date made - Gaucho's dark gaze turned downwards to Levi." I love this. It's so Gaucho. I didn't really find any other areas of note, but then Gaucho isn't a super-emotive character. You stuck with his character really well, and I loved the mixed feelings of scorn and respect for Levi throughout the entire fight.


Prose [+3]
I really like how you write Gaucho. He has a consistent style throughout the entire fight, there were no big grammar or spelling issues that I could find. Very nice.


Readability [+2]
Very simple to follow (like Gaucho) and a pleasure to read.

As a side note, I double checked all of the posts on both sides of this for length, as some of them were very long, and some of your counts were off from the counter I used. You never went over, but it's just something to think about in the future.


Finally tally: 47 HP


LEVI
Realism [-2]
"His slice on his chest was still healing, his wing could possibly be broken, and a side slice to his right barrel was still fresh. Levi was able to work with the cuts and bruises, but every time he moved, it reminded him just a little of the pain." I feel that with those sorts of injuries, particularly a potentially broken wing, Levi should have been in a LOT more pain. Those kinds of things don't just magically heal, and you don't mention him having been healed, so I'm a bit confused as to why he isn't in more pain. You make up for it a bit by talking about how bad the hit to his wing hurts, but I still feel that overall, the pain of a potentially broken wing was very heavily underplayed here in your first fighting post.

Further, in the second fighting post, the following caught my attention: "A bellowed “NOOO” had echoed even louder than the roaring thunder..." Gaucho did not yell no, he merely squealed and flailed about, or, as was written, "pantomimed NOOO". Make sure you read each post thoroughly.


Emotion [+1]
I enjoyed the determination that was present throughout the fight. Levi continuously impressed me by pushing through the pain and the poison and the craziness that is Gaucho in a desperately righteous attempt to prove himself.


Prose [-2]
I found quite a few grammar issues scattered througout your posts. "He wans’t the type to really take that," "droplets of rain fell on his scared pelt." (opening post); "aiming to trash out at Gaucho" (first fighting post) and so on. Further, in your third fighting post, this: "(Levi’s left so Gaucho’s right if you’re looking from his direction.)" was an unnecessary OOC addition to the IC portion of this post, and it really detracted from the flow. When in doubt, add footnotes at the bottom, or a summary of the attack and defense, or something along those lines.


Readability [+1]
As a general rule, your posts were easy to follow and very straightforward. Your attacks and defenses were fairly clear.

Be careful with your magic uses - the first one was very confusing to me, though you improved in the later fighting posts. Just be sure to be very clear on what you are trying to do with it.

As I did with Aud, I checked your word counts since some of these posts were very long. While they were accurate when I pasted them into word, some of them were considerably over the limit when posted into an online word counter. I'm not docking any points for this, as I can see how this could be confusing, I'm just letting you know for future reference so you are aware that different counters or programs may yield different results.


Finally tally: -1 HP

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The admin apologizes for the wait! We are working on training everyone and practicing with the rubrics!

Gaucho is awarded 1VP