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02-20-2016, 08:47 PM
--This is a terrible idea.--
Do you have a better one?
His silence through the bond answered her question, and she sighed.
It was noon, or somewhere close to it; the sun shone brightly overhead, a wintery orb in a clear blue sky. A gentle breeze played with her ivory locks, swaying them to an fro, enticing them to frolic along her nape. It was chilly, but not horrendously cold, even for Frostfall. The mare was grateful for that. Her journey's end was the Hidden Falls, a place that she had visited only once before, and the thought of frigid, falling waters kissing her coat was not an appealing one. The waterfalls' spray would still be cold, she knew, but perhaps she would avoid freezing entirely. (Should she avoid it? Maybe it would be better that way.)
But it wasn't just about her anymore, was it?
--Stupid,-- Astraeus grumbled, irritation and guilt twisting in his stomach. She felt his pain, the way he blamed himself for her weakness. He had been hunting that night. If he had been there, had been able to break through her sorrow to talk her out of it --
There was no talking me out of it, she told him firmly. It just... happened. And it had made her better, hadn't it? She could see more clearly now, could think without the self-loathing that had become so familiar. Whatever the consequence, she could not bring herself to regret her actions. She could not bring herself to feel shame, or anger, and guilt. No, whatever she had brought on herself, she had done it willingly, had welcomed the cleansing that it had granted her.
Even so, she wasn't looking forward to this.
She had to find him, before her resolve wavered.
"Kaj, where are you?" she whispered, almost to herself.
Astraeus departed, sparks falling from his feathers. He was grumpy and irritable, but he would still do anything to assist his bonded, even if he did not agree with her choices.
He would find the Aurelight.
"Talk talk talk."
--Astraeus.--
you give up your soul till you break down;
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