“Rohan, you are a strong warrior, but your presence in training has been lacking. I think your strengths are suited to Sergeant...”

Demoted.

The word clings to his mind like a splinter, festering and raw and painful, clinging to every thought like a sliver does to skin. Always there. In the days that have passed, he has tried time and time again to relieve himself of the guilt that weighs so heavily across his shoulders—a shame he has shouldered since the moment he could walk. It is a different misstep this time, of course. A different king, a different mentor, a different home; but at the core of it all, isn’t it the same? He cannot fool himself forever (try as he might) and even when he closes his eyes, even when he runs away, he can feel it—

—failure.

A disappointment.

(Is that all he will ever be?)

Insecurity is a black secret that the stallion keeps hidden away, tucked beneath and smothered by layers of hollow pride and arrogance. He is no yellow bellied pantywaist (like many others, his mind has been warped by the expectations of man and stone). No one can know how much he has doubted himself at times, no one can know how his father’s voice still haunts him at night, screaming insults and profanities that Rohan tells himself cannot be true.

And yet, here he stands—at the cliff’s edge, staring out and down, across the blue horizon and the frothy waves that crash violently below—filling his own mind with characteristics of grandeur and strength. His father’s wretched voice is not alone now, echoing with the Elephant King’s deep rumble as they both rob him of power and leave him naked, stripped and vulnerable and bleeding. (Is it because he is afraid to face his own mistakes? Is his pride too swollen and his heart too stubborn to admit to his own negligence? Is he equipped to lead anyone at all—to be a part of something greater than himself?)

Rohan’s teeth clench as his jaw muscles flex, dark-rimmed ears slanting backwards against the mess of his mane. He has never been an organized man, taking each day as it comes and living each moment to its fullest. Perhaps the mammoth of a stallion had done him a favor. Perhaps he is better off without responsibility, without the accountability of others in his care. Perhaps they are better off without looking up to him for guidance (a free-willed rogue trying to fit into herd life like a circle into a box).

Perhaps.

notes; Let's try this again<33
“Speech.”

Can you lie next to her

and give her your heart, your heart

As well as your body?